'AOA' alum Jimin, shocking update on drug and alcohol dependence... "The public dislikes me" [Star Issue]

*This content was translated by AI.

'AOA' alum Jimin (real name Shin Jimin) expressed her bitter feelings about extreme psychological anxiety and the public's cold gaze just one day before her solo comeback.

'On the 9th, Jimin posted a lengthy message on her personal SNS, saying, "Finally, there is one day left until release."

'That day, Jimin began, "For about a month, I was a mess. I became the most sensitive person in the world." She particularly confessed, "For a month, I couldn't even drink alcohol, yet I had to drink every day to fall asleep. It was because medication couldn't solve it," revealing her severe stress state that was uncontrollable even with sleep-inducing drugs.

'She also openly disclosed her physical pain. After passing the music video review, she sobbed for 20 minutes. "My lips were swollen, and I bit my hands so much that I couldn't even shampoo freely. I promised myself I would never bite my hands again, but when I came to my senses, I was doing it again," conveying her precarious mental breakdown.

'She also revealed the starkly different reality of her solo debut, which is 180 degrees different from her past idol days under the care of a major agency. Jimin recalled, "I filled two suitcases with props by myself, picked up costumes, and went around for hair and makeup. After filming, I rode the subway with slumped shoulders."

'Most of all, what troubled Jimin the most was still the public's cold gaze and the tag of malicious comments directed at her.

'Jimin lamented, "What does it matter if the song is good, or if the music video is good? Many people say they dislike me." She continued, "Even my closest friend receives malicious comments just because they are friends with me. It feels like I am holding back the friend I cherish," expressing her guilt over the criticism directed even at those around her.

'Finally, Jimin expressed her gratitude to the fans who believed in and waited for her until the end. She said, "I do not seek great love, nor do I dare to imagine it. I just want to be a person who is worthy to my friends who believed in me, my fans, and my family. This is my true heart."

'- Below is the full text of AOA alum Jimin's SNS post.

'Finally, there is one day left until release.

'For about a month, I was a mess. I couldn't explain here or there, and I became the most sensitive person in the world.

'I thought about it. I have to go on alone in the future, and if I keep doing this, even my friends who help me around me might get tired of me.

'For a month, I couldn't even drink alcohol, yet I had to drink every day to fall asleep. It was because medication couldn't solve it.

'In fact, my few friends were hard to meet these days. Because I was too sensitive. Even when we met, things weren't sorted out, and for some reason, I would often return home with a hurt heart.

'Yesterday, I finished the music video and it was finally over.

'My first thought was, "What a relief." And with the thought, "Now it's done," I looked in the mirror.

'I don't know how much I cried for 20 minutes after passing the review. My face was all black, and my hair turned all white. My lips were swollen, and I bit my hands so much that I couldn't even shampoo freely.

'My quality of life dropped so much that I promised myself I would never bite my hands again, but when I came to my senses, I was biting my hands again.

'I don't know why my tears are flowing like this all day long.

'Maybe because I've been away from home for a long time, my dog Kkuru is having bloody diarrhea. Maybe he's sick, or maybe he was very lonely. Kkuru, who was always glued to me, started sleeping in the living room at some point.

'Feeling guilty, I kept going out to the living room to bring him back, but after about three minutes, he would go out again. I couldn't remember what I couldn't do for Kkuru, but instead, I felt resentful toward Kkuru.

'I'm sorry, Kkuru.

'Trying to do it alone was too overwhelming. There were too many things to worry about, and my heart was heavy.

'And I even wondered if all the friends who helped with my music would feel proud of this work.

'But I did my best.

'Finding a filming location that I liked among the places where filming permits were granted by running around was not easy. I filled two suitcases with props by myself, picked up costumes, and went around for hair and makeup.

'After filming, I rode the subway with slumped shoulders. About an hour and a half later, when I arrived home, I thought.

'"What was my schedule for tomorrow?"

'Then I said, "Let's drink some alcohol and sleep early," and fell asleep.

'But what I want to say is this.

'What does it matter if the song is good, or if the music video is good, or if the jacket is good?

'Many people say they dislike me,

'Even my closest friend receives malicious comments just because they are friends with me.

'It's not even help; it feels like I'm holding back the friend I cherish.

'My heart aches and feels choked up.

'Nevertheless, my friends who stayed firmly by my side, thank you.

'Thank you so much for helping and supporting this unruly Jimin.

'I do not seek great love, nor do I dare to imagine it.

'I just want to be a person who is worthy to my friends who believed in me, my fans, and my family.

'This is my true heart.

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*This content was translated by AI.